Maybe you and your gyno are pals and you tell her all the dirty details of your sex life,
whether it's recounting your youthful days as a siren who conquered her
own manifest destiny of bedding all of the eligible bachelors in your
city or sharing every step you and your husband have taken while working
your way through sex therapists' suggestions.
But,
realistically, that's probably not the case, and you're more likely to
approach your annual gyno visit with trepidation, viewing those stirrups
as a symbol of torture. And perhaps you don't like talking about
vagina, viewing it as something that you only look at when you insert and remove a tampon.
But your annual OB/GYN appointment is not the time to hold stuff back!
In fact, the more info you share, the better — and these are some things
you should never, ever lie about to your doctor. Remember: like Planet
Fitness, your gyno's office is a judgment-free zone.
1. What's Really Going On With Your Sex Life
Although
it can be hard to remember all the pleasurable things that happened to
your vagina mid-pap smear, don't forget what your lady parts do when
they're not
freezing up while your feet are awkwardly positioned in stirrups. Think
about what they've been doing since the last time you saw your gyno. If
your vagina has seen more suitors in the past year than the first
cocktail party in a Bachelorette
season premiere, then it's time to disclose that you've been with a lot
of people. If you've been only with one guy forever, you should fill
your gyno in on that, too. Why? It's not so that you can come batting
averages or to make you feel ashamed or to remind you about that annoying dry spell. It's so that your gyno can know what to screen you for!
"First
and foremost, [you have to share your] number of sexual partners," says
Laurie Birkholz, OB/GYN. "Just so we can help a patient regarding to
assessing risk – including common things like HPV, and more significant
things, or more serious things like HIV. I'm always encouraging patients
to be open. They maybe a little embarrassed depending on that number,
but believe me, as physicians we should heard it all."
Not all gynos want graphic specific, though — they just want to know if you've had anything risky happen recently.
"I
don't need to know all the nitty-gritty details," says Laurie
Streicher, OB/GYN, "but if you did have unprotected sex and you are
worried, don't lie."
Contrary to what some random person on the street might have told you, gynos cannot read your mind,
and they also can't just look at your vagina and go, "oh, yes! That
woman is in a faithful relationship and has only had sexual partner." If
that were the case, uh, that would be weird....or warrant your gyno her
own reality television show, and do you really want your gyno visits to be on TV?
2. Who Exactly You're Sleeping With
No,
you don't have to fill your gyno in on your secret tryst with your
coworker (ooooh), it's to keep things accurate and, frankly, to not
waste youror their time. For instance, Alyssa Dweck, OB/GYN says that
it's important that a woman inform her if she's only sleeping with women
— Dweck says she could be going on and on and on about putting the patient on birth control, when she doesn't need to be on it at all.
3. If You Smoke
You showered seven times to rid the smell of smoke off your body after chastising your drunken self's logic that cigarettes totally go with martinis!!! Don't tell your judgmental yoga buddy, fine, but tell the truth to your gyno.
"Never
lie about smoking," Streicher stresses. "A lot of times, if someone
wants birth control and I'm deciding if it would be safe," she'll ask
them that. She says some people might be scared it will change her
decision to prescribe them birth control or not, "but the truth is their
risk is going to change based on that – [with increased risks for]
blood clot, heart attacks, stroke."
You
should also be honest about how much you're drinking — it's important
to know if you're usually having, say, seven drinks over the course of a
night versus just one. Knowing about a patient's drinking habits is
crucial, Dweck explains. (For example: If you've had a few drunken
Saturday nights and missed your 10 p.m. pill, your doctor might want to
suggest a different kind of birth control is best for you.)
4. If You're Taking Vitamins or Supplements
Don't
let any lore fool you. Even if you're taking supplements that a local
wizened sage made from scratch from the dirt of the Earth, tell. Your.
Gyno. And if you are the kind of woman who's a ~casual Advil user~, let
your gyno know that, too.
"A
little pet peeve of mine is not knowing what supplements people are
taking," says Dweck, "You ask them about medications, and they say, 'I
just take Tylenol,' and they fail to tell you that they're taking five
over the counter herbal supplements things that could interfere with
fertility or cause bleeding."
5. If You're Experiencing Any Violence At Home
Birkholz
advises women to disclose if they're experiencing any domestic
violence, regardless if you're pregnant or not, although pregnant women,
she says, can be especially vulnerable.Why tell your gyno? Well, a recent study recently revealed that partner violence is one of the leading causes of pregnancy-related deaths. If you're not pregnant, your ob/gyn can connect you with someone who might be able to help.
6. If You're Scared About Missing the Boat for Having Kids
So
you're flying your single lady flag high and have chosen to suppress
your desires to have kid some day, but you're telling your therapist
about how you secretly doodle stick figure mothers and daughters on the
back of your business cards. While you can keep your Freudian art
between you and your therapist, you should tell your gyno that you might
want kids someday — even if it's something that you feel can't happen
right now.
"I think one
thing [patients] never bring up is their time line," says Dweck. "We
don't want to miss the window of opportunity. We should start asking
questions about child planning desires ... because fertility does decline." For example, a doctor could advise you about freezing your eggs if you want to have kids but motherhood seems like galaxies away.
7. If You Have ***Any*** Questions
Sugarcoating your sex life when your hairdresser implores you for
gossip? Fine. But if you have any questions about your sex life or
anything vagina-related.
"I
always encouraging patients to ask questions about sexuality if they're
having painful intercourse, if intercourse isn't enjoyable, or if
they're thinking about using a vibrator or bringing some other item or
idea into [your] sexual relationship," says Birkholz. "I think those are
also important to speak with [your doctor] about, so we can help and
provide resources and education."
Once
again: Gynos can't read your minds or see into the past and future of
your sex life by sticking a speculum up your vagina. They need guidance
so that they can provide you with what you need for your own health.
Bottom line? "We just want to know the truth," Dweck says, "there's really no judgment."
0 comments: